Discipline > Correction

 Kellie and I have GREAT KIDS.  I’m sorry to be braggadocios.  But, what can you expect.  Every parent is proud of their kids.  J

We are so proud of Madison and Michael.  They bring us much joy and love. 

Kellie and I have had people comment on how mature and well behaved our kids are.  Both Madison and Michael do well in school.  Both have already accomplished a lot early in life.  Both have healthy relationships.  Both have learned the value of discipline and hard work. 

I would like to share a philosophy with you that Kellie and I have used to raise our children:

We have focused 90 percent of our energy on loving, accepting, and encouraging our kids, and 10 percent on punishment, scolding, and threatening.  Okay…may 70/30  JJ Our children have simply responded better to the positive more than to the negative.

The reason I share this is because I have encountered parents yelling at their kids or threatening them.  I hear parents tell me that they have had to punish their kids, or take things away from them.  I hear of special schools they send them to, or summer camps – all to keep their kids “out of trouble.” I’m just not sure that’s the best way.

I believe there is a difference between discipline and correction.  Though they have similarities, I see a distinction.

 Discipline is defined as training to obey rules.  The Latin Word trellis means rule.  A trellis is commonly used in landscaping when you want a plant to grow a certain way or in to a particular shape.  To grow the plant, you “train” the limbs of the plant around the trellis.  The trellis, or “rule” will help guide the plant to grow and flourish the way it is intended.

In my view, Discipline is a positive thing.  It is empowering, it is liberating! Discipline is a powerful tool that helps train children to follow rules – rules which protect, which bring focus, which enable achievement faster than living without rules. 

Discipline happens best as proactive.  Discipline works effectively with encouragement and positive reinforcement. 

Correction, on the other hand is always reactive.  Correction takes place when a mistake was made.  Correction is necessary when a child breaks the rules or resists the rules.  Correction must be communicated directly and clearly.  Correction feels negative to the child.

Let me stop and clarify:  Correction is necessary and appropriate.  I am NOT advocating all positive, love and encouragement.  We have certainly had moments of correction and punishment with our children.

My point is:

Discipline is more effective than Correction. 

Discipline > Correction

Let me encourage you to consider how you are using discipline as a positive reinforcement with lots of love and encouragement to train your child.  I have learned that being proactive with teaching discipline is much more effective than waiting to be reactive with lots of correction.  And, when you must correct your children, surround it with love, acceptance and encouragement.

Your Kids will rise to a new level – they love you and want to please you!