Discipline > Correction

 Kellie and I have GREAT KIDS.  I’m sorry to be braggadocios.  But, what can you expect.  Every parent is proud of their kids.  J

We are so proud of Madison and Michael.  They bring us much joy and love. 

Kellie and I have had people comment on how mature and well behaved our kids are.  Both Madison and Michael do well in school.  Both have already accomplished a lot early in life.  Both have healthy relationships.  Both have learned the value of discipline and hard work. 

I would like to share a philosophy with you that Kellie and I have used to raise our children:

We have focused 90 percent of our energy on loving, accepting, and encouraging our kids, and 10 percent on punishment, scolding, and threatening.  Okay…may 70/30  JJ Our children have simply responded better to the positive more than to the negative.

The reason I share this is because I have encountered parents yelling at their kids or threatening them.  I hear parents tell me that they have had to punish their kids, or take things away from them.  I hear of special schools they send them to, or summer camps – all to keep their kids “out of trouble.” I’m just not sure that’s the best way.

I believe there is a difference between discipline and correction.  Though they have similarities, I see a distinction.

 Discipline is defined as training to obey rules.  The Latin Word trellis means rule.  A trellis is commonly used in landscaping when you want a plant to grow a certain way or in to a particular shape.  To grow the plant, you “train” the limbs of the plant around the trellis.  The trellis, or “rule” will help guide the plant to grow and flourish the way it is intended.

In my view, Discipline is a positive thing.  It is empowering, it is liberating! Discipline is a powerful tool that helps train children to follow rules – rules which protect, which bring focus, which enable achievement faster than living without rules. 

Discipline happens best as proactive.  Discipline works effectively with encouragement and positive reinforcement. 

Correction, on the other hand is always reactive.  Correction takes place when a mistake was made.  Correction is necessary when a child breaks the rules or resists the rules.  Correction must be communicated directly and clearly.  Correction feels negative to the child.

Let me stop and clarify:  Correction is necessary and appropriate.  I am NOT advocating all positive, love and encouragement.  We have certainly had moments of correction and punishment with our children.

My point is:

Discipline is more effective than Correction. 

Discipline > Correction

Let me encourage you to consider how you are using discipline as a positive reinforcement with lots of love and encouragement to train your child.  I have learned that being proactive with teaching discipline is much more effective than waiting to be reactive with lots of correction.  And, when you must correct your children, surround it with love, acceptance and encouragement.

Your Kids will rise to a new level – they love you and want to please you!

I AM

Every time I think about my fears, my insecurities, my struggles, I realize that I am not enough.  

However, God tells me through His Holy Word that He is more than enough.

God declares to each one of us

I AM

I am fearful, I am limited.

I AM all sufficient. I AM all you have need of.

I am all alone.

I AM always with you.

I am not equipped and I am overwhelmed with resistance.

I AM a Mighty Fortress.

I AM your Sheild and Buckler.

I AM the Captain of the Hosts of all the heavenly armies.

I am anxious, I am not sure of the future.

I AM the Prince of Peace.

I AM the same yesterday, today, and forever.

I am not sure what is happening in the world.

I am not sure about the end of times.

I AM the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end.

I AM coming back again for you!

God Is Faithful

God, You are Faithful

You are faithful

You have always been faithful

When you called me to surrender my life to you

You were faithful

In all of Your promises

You have been faithful

Through some of my rough life transitions

You were faithful

At times, when I wanted to give up

You stayed faithful

When I have been unfaithful

You remained faithful

When I didn’t know at times how I was going to pay the bills

You were faithful

When wars and rumors of wars buzz through the news

You will be faithful

Though I am uncertain what lies ahead for me

You will be faithful

Work of Man or Miracle of God?

We all know the story of David and Goliath – the famous Bible story of boy versus beast, hero versus villain.  Boys in particular like this story because they can picture themselves on the battlefield like David getting ready to fight the giant in front of all of the armies watching.  I wonder if George Lucas got his idea of Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader from the Bible?

While the battle scene is likely the most exciting scene in the story, I am drawn to the part of the story that leads up to the dramatic conclusion.  I like to ask the question “how in the world did a little boy, David get in that spot to fight Goliath in the first place?” 

The reason David is the hero of the story is that someone else did not step up; that someone else should have been Saul.  Saul was the King of Israel.  He was anointed and appointed by God to lead and to protect Israel. 

However, Saul relied too much on his own skill and strength.  Saul came from a prominent family.  He was tall and strong and was a natural leader.  So, when this monster, Goliath comes on the scene, Saul retreats to his tent and tries to figure out how he is going to defeat the giant.  Saul acted like he was trying figure out a strategy, when in reality, he was paralyzed by fear. 

David, on the other hand, did not hesitate.  He spoke up against the giant and faced him head-on in the battlefield – with no fear! Though David was just a young boy, David had developed a great faith in His God.

At one point, just before David rushed on to the battlefield, Saul instructed his men to fit David with Saul’s armor and weapons.  Saul was trying to help David.  However, the armor only constrained David.  David insisted on fighting without it.

Saul saw only a physical battle

David knew it was a spiritual battle

Saul saw a giant

David focused on God

Saul thought it would take a work of man

David knew that it would take a miracle of God

The battle scene is epic.  It’s breath taking.  It’s why I always wanted to be Luke Skywalker.  With only a sling shot in his hand, David stood before Goliath and said:

 I Samuel 17 “You come against me with sword and spear and javelin,but I come against you in the name of the Lord Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel!"

David slung a stone at the giant hitting him right between the eyes! The giant fell and David killed him by cutting off his head!

However, unlike Luke Skywalker in the movie, Star Wars, it’s not just some “Force” that guides David – 

it’s God, the GREAT I AM, the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob who fights for Him!

Put your faith in God.  Stand up against the giants in your life – through the power of God.

Surrender your life to Jesus Christ today.  He will make you a Victor!

Don't Beat the Messenger

In the Bible, there is a story about a prophet and his donkey.  In Bible times, before the Bible was assembled, God would speak to people through prophets, those called by God to speak specific words at specific times.  God wanted relationship with His special people, Israel.  However, Israel was always straying away from the commands of God, thinking they knew better how to live.  In order to save His people from self-inflicted pain or defeat by enemies, God would speak words of warning to Israel through His anointed (or “called-out”) prophets.  Many times, the prophets had to speak against evil rulers of Israel and call them out on their sin or even compromise from what God had asked them to do.  

In the book of Numbers, chapter 22, Balaam is charged with speaking God’s Word to an evil ruler.  However, Balaam is intimidated by this ruler and is fearful to give the true Word of God.  Balaam is more afraid of a man than he is God.

Balaam is headed to meet with this ruler, when the donkey he is riding on changes direction.  Balaam beats the donkey until it gets back on the road.  The donkey keeps getting off course, so Balaam gets more frustrated and beats his animal.  Suddenly, the donkey TALKS back to Balaam! “why do you beat me?” Balaam is so frustrated that he almost passes by the fact that his own donkey is talking to him.  “You have made a fool of me.  if only I had my sword, I would kill you right now!” shouts Balaam.  Numbers 22:29-30

Suddenly, God opens Balaam’s eyes to reveal a huge Angel standing right in front of Balaam, blocking his path.  The Angel said to Balaam, 

“Why have you beaten your donkey these three times? I have come here to oppose you because your path is a reckless one before me.  The donkey saw me and turned away from me these three times. If it had not turned away, I would certainly have killed you by now, but I would have spared it.” Numbers 22:32-33

Balaam immediately confessed his sin and repented, deciding to give the ruler God’s true Word.  Balaam was INCHES away from sudden death by God’s Angel, only because he had ignored God’s signs from his donkey!

God has been teaching me listen for His voice in my life.  He has been challenging me to not have to re-learn the lessons that He has been trying to teach me.  

My tendency is to not listen, but to go down the path I think is best.  What drives this tendency is not healthy - it’s not God-honoring.  It is fear of failure, a desire to receive attention and applause from others.  It’s anxiousness and worry.  

I have found that many times, God begins to speak to me through other people (prophets).  God also sometimes has to speak to me through things going hay wire in my life (a donkey going off path.)  God probably has to use these other “voices” because I am not always in tune with His Voice.  

If you want to hear God’s 

voice, read His Word

(the Bible)

When I read God’s Word, or when I can see God speaking to me through someone else, or when I sense that God is trying to get my attention through a change in my schedule, I stop and thank Him.  The fact that a Great and Awesome God chooses to speak to me is thrilling.  God wants relationship with me.  He wants to show me a better way to live, to love, to laugh.  God wants me to have a full and rich life, and He wants to walk closely with me.  

May we learn to stop, look and listen for God’s Voice today.  May we be quick to let go of our

fears and anxieties, 

and embrace our Loving, Faithful God.  

Kellie & I with our daughter, Madison after Middle School Graduation

Our Father

What is the proper view of God? The Bible shows God as Creator, Judge, King, Lord.  God is all of these things and much more.  Indeed, the Bible proclaims that God is unlimited, omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent. 

But what is the overarching role that God plays? How do we define a God Who is undefinable?

Jesus gives a glimpse into Who God is… and even making that statement is difficult to comprehend, as John, chapter 1 declares that Jesus IS GOD and is EQUAL with God, AND has ALWAYS BEEN GOD.  

In the book of Luke, chapter 11, we see the disciples of Jesus asking Him “how should we pray?”

Jesus responded with “Our Father, Who art in Heaven.” Jesus’ relationship to God was a FATHER/SON relationship.

As I pondered this relationship, my mind went to Jesus’ earthly father, Joseph.  I wonder how that relationship was? between that father and son? My guess is that Joseph loved Jesus.  Jospeh certainly raised Jesus well and even mentored him to be a carpenter like himself.  A father naturally will pass on his knowledge to his children. That’s what good parents do.

However, Joseph knew that Jesus was not REALLY his son.  Jesus was born of a virgin from the Holy Spirit.  And though Joseph loved Jesus like a son, he probably saw himself more as a caregiver than a father.  Jesus was the promised Messiah from God.  Jesus was BIGGER than Joseph.  

And how did Jesus feel about Joseph? Did Jesus ever really identify with him? There was never really a connect between them, because Jesus had a different mission-he was built for something else.  When Joseph and Mary lost track of Jesus one time on a trip, they did not know where to look for Him.  Eventually they went back to the temple and saw Jesus teaching and learning.  Jesus had to explain to his parents “didn’t you know that I would be in my Father’s house?”

Now we know that Jesus was perfect in every way - I’m sure he showed Joseph great respect.  However, could it be that Jesus, as a young man never felt like he had anyone on earth who could truly understand him? Studies show that children find their identity through their father.  Jesus could never truly find his identity through Jospeh.  As Joseph is teaching Jesus how to saw wood and glue together a chair, Jesus is uninterested and probably distracted.  Jesus had another calling - one that Joseph could never lead Him in.

This is why Jesus developed such a vibrant prayer life with God.  Jesus found intimacy with God - God was the Father to His Son, Jesus.  

Just imagine how Jesus felt when, after his earthly father had died, that Jesus went to be baptized, and when He did, His HeavenlyFather said publicly “this is MY SON in whom I AM well pleased.” The Holy Spirit descended on Him in the form of a dove, to signify the anointing and calling on His life.

God is bigger than our comprehension.  He goes beyond our limits.  But God describes Himself as:

Our Father, Who art in Heaven

Maybe your father here on earth is less than perfect.  Maybe your father was not attentive, put you down, or worse, was abusive.  Maybe you never really knew your father.  When you hear the word “Dad” or “Father”, you check out.  That scar is just too deep - you hide it and protect it.  You don’t want to go there.

God is your true Father.  He has a calling on your life.  

He is saying “YOU ARE MY SON, MY DAUGHTER IN WHOM I AM WELL PLEASED.” He wants to send His Holy Spirit to rest on your life, to be with you always, to lead you, to heal you, to lead you to Jesus.

Let God reach in and touch that father-wound.  I know it is hard to take your hands off the wound, and be vulnerable with your past and scars.  But your Father wants to touch that place with his loving hands and heal you.  

Your Father loves you! He’s thinking of You - right now.  He is well pleased with you.

Take a moment RIGHT NOW and invite Him into your life.  Thank Him for His love - and tell Him you accept His love and His healing for your wounds.